Celebrating a man deeply admired

 

Happy Birthday to my Father-in-law, Clarence. October 22, 2014, would have been his 81st birthday. He was a man who worked hard, played hard, and loved deep. He had a twinkle in his eye, an easy laugh, and a hankering for sweets.

For a little over twenty-one years, I have lived near my father-in-law. Yet, I learned more about the depth of his character during the last 13 months of his life than all the years before. Oh, his character was there all along but the depth of it was revealed through a long trial of watching him struggle to breathe in the hospital for months. It is hard to remember those days of suffering – it was equally hard to see his wife so distraught at his distress. And yet, it was in the suffering, that I saw a man worthy of my deep admiration.

He left a strong legacy in his daughter and five sons. This year he celebrates his birthday with Jesus.

In a few days from now, we will remember the last day we saw him alive. Then, a few more days and we will remember the day he went to be with Jesus. We miss you Clarence!

 

 

Some links to the other part of the story:

An answered prayer just for her 

A cheerful heart is good medicine

Walking in the shadow of death

When Coca-cola made me cry

and one of my favorites from this season:

Remembering Right Things

We grieve with hope, as it says in I Thessalonians 4:13-14:

"But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who have fallen asleep in Jesus."

What we've been up to this weekend

The kids and I made a welcome banner when we heard Papa might be coming home. I did the lettering. The four kids painted the banner.  It sure was touch-n-go even on that day. At least three, if not more, times we heard that he's not coming home. He arrived around 9 o'clock on Friday night. We have all learned a lot about hospitals, doctors, nurses, and medical procedures these past four months. We are still learning. Now, it is about home health care and how to nurse our loved one back to full health. We are so thankful that he's alive and now even closer to us.

Meagan waits with Grandma after a stressful day of waiting. Transitions and beginnings are so hard. We were glad that he was coming home but there was a lot to coordinate to get him here, which mostly other people do. We had to wait and wait. And sometimes that is the hardest thing to do.

T

In his bed, Grandpa made it! After four long months in the hospital, he finally made it home. One third of a year he has spent away from home, including three hospitals and a nursing facility. As Sophie said, "The last time I roller-bladed at his house, I was in shorts. Now it's chilly. It made me realize how long he has been in the hospital." It has been so nice to have him around this weekend as we learn how to do tube feedings, nebulizer treatments, and help him walk and other various duties. We can let him nap while we play a game or do a craft. He is always around us when he is awake. So nice for him and for us.

I love this shot of Papa being wheeled into the house. You can see his name blurred in the background. He has an amazing amount of determination and courage. I have learned a lot by watching him these past four months. I have learned about living a life of no debts, especially relationally. He has lived a life of integrity, a life of faith. He has walked the path of submission. One cannot always see the most valuable things easily.

In the middle of the weekend, Grandma taught the grandkids how to make Kringla, one of my very favorite desserts that she makes. They are baking as I type. Yum. Yum. They will soon be gone.

The kids have made Kringla, duct tape wallets, played lots of games with Aunt Kay, and rollerbladed. This is much nicer than hanging out in hospital waiting rooms for them. I imagine we'll be having more school days over here in the future to provide support for Grandma as she nurses Grandpa back to health.

Some napping has also been in order this weekend. Kip grabs a bit of shut-eye on the front porch in the amazingly nice weather. We have all had a lot of information to absorb about when and how to administer medicine and coordinate supplies coming to the house. Much to learn. Much to do. Plus, Kip has been night duty, sleeping near Grandpa.

A beautiful weekend. So thankful for so many things, especially loving family that supports one another. Linking with the Company Coffee girls. Join us for a chat if you like.

When coca-cola made me cry...

Fulfilled Longing

He had been silent for four weeks.
 And then he spoke.

He said, "Coca-cola"
Because that's what the speech therapist told him to say.

And I cried.
I wanted to weep.
Instead tears ran down my cheeks.

He spoke. Emotion erupted from my eyes. I didn't know how much I had been longing for him to speak again. Until those tears came streaming down.

Proverbs 13:12 says:
"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."

Silent tears giving testimony to a longing fulfilled. May he -- my father-in-law -- who is still in the hospital battling to clear his lungs speak ever, clearer and clearer.

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Have you been startled by the intensity of a longing fulfilled?

Linking also with Jen at SDG sisters and Emily at Imperfect Prose

A 30 Day Prayer

art by Kathleen Jaeger

For 30 days my father-in-law has been in the hospital. For half of those days, he has needed help to breathe with a ventilator. For 21 of those days, he has been in ICU. For the last week, he has been in a regular room with no major set-backs. This week has been slow & steady progress, much better than the drastic up & down roller-coaster we had been on.

A week with no major set-backs has meant that I have cleaned the bathrooms, straightened the house, made a meal plan for the first time in awhile. My daughter was able to practice the piano every day.

The past thirty days -- though filled with crisis, pain, tears, confusion, and a lot of driving. They have also been filled with time spent with friends and family around the table sharing stories. Lots of prayers and hugs. Lots of out of town family coming into town.

Today I felt very, very drained. In my devotional the verses said, "Consider it all joy when you encounter trials of various kinds..." and "bring the sacrifice of thank offerings..." Though the week itself was lighter, I think the stress & difficulty of the past 3 weeks caught up and came crashing down upon me.

At just the right time, a friend sent a note with a Starbuck's gift card and a verse about the soul being weary...at just the right time there was spiritual encouragement at a Bible study and a very real meal delivered to me & my family.

It is easy to think of how tired I am. How hard it has been. It takes effort to focus on the amazing timing of events displaying God's love and care in the midst of great strain. But I do want to focus on that. This post is part of that...but know there is struggle and there is life. And there is  a God who cares about us all.

Thank you, God for breath. Thank for the progress of my father-in-law this week.
Amen.

Also linking with Jen, click here for more encouragement.

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How about you? Has there been a season of trial in which you could still see God working and displaying His loving-kindness?