Happenings Around These Parts Lately

 Here is a little bit of what is happening in the small moments of my life lately.  I sorted my bags of beans and rice into clean jars. Then I got inspired and taped the bag labels on the jars. Just a small piece of organization in my home that all the cupboards and shelves wish that they had.

 This is a snapping turtle caught by my nine-year-old son with the help of his older sister. This turtle was caught in our 'creek'. It's not really a creek. It is the drainage water from the neighborhood and yet a snapping turtle lives in it and so do crawdads. We love our creek and it has provided hours of entertainment for these suburb-bound kids.

While my nine-year-old was catching snapping turtles, my 16-year-old was off for the weekend checking out a college. Eeek! How has this happened? How have they grown up? Because the oldest was off checking out a college, I can't even believe how much joy the catching of this snapping turtle in our yard brought me.

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 I am finally getting brave enough to venture out on my own and purchase flowers and plant them. I think of my flower friends and gardening in-laws who have come alongside me to help me learn how to plant things. I've learned  a few things, especially how important water is to growing things. As in, you must remember to water your plants.

I can't even believe how happy it makes me to have planted flowers in my yard. I'm not very good at gardening because I am not too good at paying attention to when it is time to plant and taking advantage of good weather. So, I love my perennial bushes and trees that provide most of the color in our yard. But I am so excited about this small amount of flowers in my yard. It is a huge accomplishment for me.

This pictures is simply because it happened to be green shirt day for us and it wasn't even St. Patrick's Day! Three of the kids randomly selected green shirts so my oldest son put on a green shirt and told me that it was green shirt day. He even got wet mowing the lawn and changed into a second green t-shirt. The best surprise of the day was that Daddy was wearing a green shirt. He leaves for work before any of us are awake and so we never know what he is wearing. So it was a fun surprise that he, too, was wearing a green shirt. So we had to take a selfie to commenorate this very important moment.

What's happening in your world?

Savoring the memories, captures the joy

Yep. It's true. You are seeing Christmas photos in February. In a culture that speeds ever forward, I am tempted not to post these pictures. The voices in my head say: 'This is not current. This is not what we are doing today. Social media is about the ever-present now.Who is interested in this?'

As it turns out, I am.  I'm posting these pictures of our recent Christmas celebrations to capture joy. It brings me great joy, not just now but long into the future, to reminisce about special celebrations. Not only is it easy to move on in the technological world and not post pictures of something that seems like old news, it is easy to speed on in life. The next item on the agenda comes so quickly, begging to be checked off the list. It makes it hard to savor the good times.

Since it will be awhile before I put them in a book, I will savor these memories in a blog post. It was a special time. I live 1,000 miles from my family. I used to take for granted that I could get to see them whenever we had planned. Then, my husband lost his job. Our situation changed. The first Christmas that I didn't make it to Minnesota to see them I cried hard.

But it taught me a great lesson. Don't take it for granted. So in the that spirit. Posting these Christmas pictures is also about being thankful and grateful that we were able to go. 

I asked my kids what they liked best about our Christmas trip. We saw our cousins and went to a basketball game, pizza party, went ice skating, and snow tubing. I assumed that those would be at the top of the list. But they really enjoyed the time being able to read at Grandma and Grandpa's house and play games with them. They liked the events, too. But they also liked time to just hang out all together.

So enjoy the trip of getting to know us a little better and the highlights of our Christmas. Perhaps you can also think of ways to remember and be thankful for the good and perfect gifts that you have been given.

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I met two new members of our family: our great nephew (yep, it's true: I'm a great aunt!)  and our newest nephew. What joy it is to welcome new members of our family and also play with younger members of the family.

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We enjoyed some winter activities: snowman building, snow shoveling, ice skating, and tubing!

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We enjoyed extra family time: we watched my nephew's basketball game with a pizza party at my brother & his family's house, and a sleep-over at my sister's house. We played board games with Grandma and Grandpa.



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We enjoyed traditional Christmas celebrations: looking at a Christmas photo album of my mom's that highlights 50 years of Christmas, eating our traditional polish sausage & poppyseed bread for Christmas eve dinner, conversations, and gift exchanges.

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We enjoyed time with my extended family. We had a chance to join the annual Christmas party so I was able to see aunts, uncles, and cousins that I hadn't seen in 6 years. My children hardly remember meeting any of them so for them it could count as meeting my relatives. Santa even makes a special appearance every year for my relatives. See how special they are?

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We had time to enjoy sleeping in, reading, playing games with my folks, and I even slipped away to see just a couple of girlfriends. So good to have down time to breathe.

Upon our return, we celebrated  our Christmas here back at home. The glow sticks were one of the biggest hits of the night. Truly it is the little things that turn out to be our favorite thing of all. It is so good to take pictures. It is so good to stop and savor the memories. It is so good to be grateful. I am thankful that pictures help me remember the good things in my life.

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Here's to the joy of creating and the joy of remembering!

What have you created or remembered lately?

Christmas cheer: It's worth it!

My nine-year-old son has been initiating Christmas cheer around here. Not the teenagers. Not the parents. It has been the joy and wonder of the youngest that has motivated us to put up our tree, to read our Advent calendar, to decorate our house, to bake Christmas cookies.

I am thankful for this encouragement to find Christmas joy in the nooks and crannies of our home and our busy lives.

I get stressed at this time of year -- what mother doesn't? Yet, I don't always realize how much my children know that and dislike a stressed out momma.

During the past few years when life got a bit more topsy-turvy than usual (read about that  here and here), I haven't had the drive to create all of our usual Christmas traditions. This year the kids were asking to bake cookies again since we hadn't done it in a few years. My oldest noticed the look on my face; he said that he would rather not do the cookies if it was going to stress me out.

His comment caused me to pause.

I know that the look on my face was partly due to the sigh in my heart at letting traditions, such as the cookie decorating, fall to the wayside. I love the rituals and the traditions. I want to be able to say that we decorated Christmas cookies: Every. Single. Year. But... I can't.

So part of my look was that disappointment and part of it was wondering: 'How can we fit it all in?' My oldest took the look to mean: Mom is stressed by this request.

I'm glad he spoke. It got me thinking.

First, I realized this: Life is stressful.There is a lot to do in this season, a lot of which hinges on the momma. But taking out the meaningful or fun parts will never reduce my life to being completely stress-free. Therefore, I must make time for joy. We must do I the activities that give our lives meaning.

However, this is where discernment is needed. These 'must-do' activities are not to be confused with pressure, or the obligations or the images I have of  'just how things are suppose to be.' They need to be the essential ones we really love.

I need to examine in order to reduce how much I need to do; having less to do also helps to reduce my stress level. Keep it simple. Keep the list short. Then, I need to be sure to keep the activities that give meaning and energy to our lives do not fall by the wayside because I am too stressed.

Secondly, I realized this: not only do I need to do those important, meaningful life giving activities, such as decorating Christmas cookies. I also need to participate in them with a non-stressed look on my face. It would be best if I would be light and free spirit and truly enjoy the moment. 

It helps if I remember I have chosen this moment and it's worth it. I can do this by remembering that the fun, the memories, the traditions, they are not what add stress to my life.  Life is just stressful.

So instead of throwing out all of the fun we're making time for a few of our favorite traditions this year: Christmas cards, birthday parties, and cookie decorating. We are filling our lives this season with opportunities for joy, laughter, and memories due to a momma listening to the desires of a nine-year-old boy and letting it inspire her to keep on, keeping on the very best things in her world.

How is this season going for you?

In this busy -- often stressful -- season:

Which activities bring you and your loved ones energy & joy? 

Could you reduce your list to a small core of the 'most meaningful'?

What activities are the most important to keep doing for you and your family?

10 Lessons of October 2014

10 Things I Learned in October 2014

1) I miss my family more than I realize. While hanging out with my mom, my sister, & my niece during their October visit, I realized afresh how much I miss all of my family. Just because I've adapted to the gap, does not mean the gap isn't there.

2) Huge beach balls, bubbles, and confetti all contribute to the art of celebration. Thanks to the Rend Collective concert and the reminder that we need to be intentional about celebration in our lives.

3) Trick or treating for teenagers is much more fun with friends.

4) I am inspired by high school debaters. They give me great hope for the next generation.

5) Sometimes when I am compelled to lead a Bible study, it isn't about some great work that God will do through me. Instead it is about a message that God has for me,  the Bible study leader. Right here.  Right now. The study is Stronger: Finding Hope in Fragile Places by Angela Thomas.

6) I have thoroughly underlined the book Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brene Brown. One among many insights gleaned and embraced is the fact that it is okay if I need to grieve differently than other people. I don't need to wait until everyone feels the same as me. I can do what I need to grieve even if it means this extrovert needs to do some of it alone.

7) As my sister shared some of her struggles as a single mom due to the death of her husband four years ago, I realized afresh we never know someone else's story and how they got where they are. I know her story; I have great admiration for how she lives out her path. However, when she shared some of her story, I realized that I needed to have more compassion on people when I don't know their story. It is a reminder that it is easy to judge by appearances.

8) I am learning afresh how much that I like to write. My Wednesday evenings have changed and I am taking the opportunity to write. I love it.

9) After one year on Facebook, I realize that more of my on-line time has gone to Facebook instead of reading and writing blog posts. Is this good or bad? Or the way that I want it to be? Not sure. But it is the reason why I have posted even less over the past year.

10) I am learning right now that I would really like lists to have 10 items even when I can't think of things that I have learned.

Linking with friends at Chatting at the Sky.
The End.

Endurance takes a long time to learn

You would think that as a distance runner I would have understood better the need for time in building endurance. I have run a full 26.2 marathon and will soon run my fourth half-marthon.

I know that endurance is not gained quickly. My daughter and I started training months ago in preparation for our event. Slowly but surely we have increased our runs from two miles to twelve miles. Even though I ran this same half-marathon event a year ago. I must still keep training or I will not be able to do it.

So why did I expect anything different in my spiritual life? Quick endurance does not exist. So, why am I surprised to still need the spiritual pluck to keep moving on in this season of non-crisis?

James 1:2-4 says, " Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,  because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

When we had bonus children come and stay with us for 9 weeks back in the spring of 2012, I recited these verses as often as I could in the few isolated moments that I could find. I focused on considering it pure joy by saying the phrase over and over. "Consider it pure joy...."

A few months later, after the kids returned to their families, my father-in-law went into the hospital and stayed for almost 5 months. My husband and I lived close so we were part of the hands-on care. While it was a privelege to serve family, care-taking is exhausting.

During this season, I began to recite James 1:2-4 again. This time the focus was on the perservance. 

It has been two years since I first clung to these verses and, honestly, I am tired of clinging. I would like the lesson to be learned so that I can check it off my list. Perhaps even sing of the joy of the lesson learned. Instead, I am still here putting one step in front of the other, wishing that the feelings of joy came more often.

And today, just a few moments ago, I realized that endurance is not quickly learned. 

"Stop being surprised, Kathleen, that endurance takes time!" I almost laughed out loud at this revelation.  I need to keep on, keeping on in my considerations of joy.

I need to consider even these days of non-crisis but full of chaotic life-that-I-can-hardly-keep-up-with-three-teenagers all joy.

If one can only learn to run for hours by running for hours, it should come as no surprise that endurance in the spiritual life can only come through enduring trials for a long time.

From here to there and back again (3,000 miles)

It's been awhile since I've appeared here in this writing space. I've driven 3,000 miles since I last posted and those are just the miles that I logged across country.I'm not counting the trips back and forth to friends, family, and camps. In this photo posed with a Route 66 mug full of steaming coffee, I am near the end of that 3,000 mile journey staying at a friend's airstream camper. What a perfect picture to depict our journeys from Nashville to Chicago to Minneapolis to Louisville and back again.. In addition to travels, here a few additional things going on in our household.

We have welcomed a new cat into our home.

We have put a new roof on the house. (Well contractors put it on but there is a process in all of it from selecting shingles to cutting a check)

We have celebrated 20 years of marriage with 6 days of hubby & myself while the kids spent a week at the cousins with their annual Cousin Extravaganza Time.

We celebrated a friend's milestone birthday with cherished friends singing 70-80s hits with a karaoke sing along, discovering once again how few words we actually know to the verses of those growing up songs.

We celebrated our niece's 8th birthday and climbed around rocks and through the rivers of Minnehaha Park in Minneapolis.

This are just a few of the things that have been happnening in this corner of my world. Many thoughts have been jumbling around in my head, a few have made it onto a page or two. Hopefully soon more words will join us here.

Love, Kathleen

When you need encouragement for the everyday

I have been cocooning lately, wrapped up mostly in my home. Our homeschooling actually reflects that we've been home, which means better school days.

I'm thankful for these slow days. It means it's been awhile since the last crisis. I think February was void of them. How nice. Except that I've forgotten how to function without crisis after the 'year of nutzo on steroids." (Which was 2012). I keep thinking, "This shouldn't be that hard."  And yet these normal gray February days have been hard.

I'm thankful to be running again after a one-year hiatus. Last year at this time I wasn't running. I was learning to walk without a limp due to tearing the MCL in my left knee. It is sweet to be able to train with my 13-year-old daughter for a half-marathon especially because I had to drop-out of training with my then thirteen-year-old son.

I'm thankful to be able to move. I'm thankful to train again for a half-marathon with one of my children. And I'm thankful that we have felt the need to train because of these hard, gray February --and now March-- days. The running has helped ward off the blues.

And the whisper in my ear has also helped. The whisper of the small, still voice inside of me that has reminded me that I need Him on all kinds of days. Not just crisis days. But also ordinary, every-day days. I need Him all of the time even when I think I should be able to do this in my own strength.

"..apart from me you can do nothing..." John 15:5 NIV

He didn't just mean that I could only do bigger-than-me tasks -- like take in four extra kids on a moment's notice. He means that apart from Him, I can do nothing.

It is okay that I need Him to do the every day small tasks. I am learning to be content with that. I am learning again how to walk with Him in the everyday.

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Here are some other voices that have encouraged me lately:

Edie's words in her blog at Life in Gracetoday, that are also in her e-book, about raising gracious kids just really tugged at my heart today. Read it here

I needed to hear Elizabeth's voice on treating herself more compassionately, too. I could relate all too well. Read about that here.

Also linking with Michelle and Emily today.

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 Have you been in need of encouragement lately? 

Where have you been finding it?