What To Do With Day Old Bread or How We Make a Great Team

My husband & I make a good team. Just a day or two ago, I prepped our breakfast of French Toast the night before using our day old French bread. He cooked it in the morning.

This works for us because I am the night owl and he is the morning guy. He sets the alarm and makes sure that I get up to eat breakfast with him about once/week. Usually he wakes and leaves for work while the rest of us are still snoozing. But one day a week, we make an effort to eat breakfast together. This started a little over a year ago.

He preps a nice breakfast, such as the French Toast I mentioned or perhaps an omelet with fresh fruit as pictured here. We have coffee and breakfast under our twinkle lights that light up our dining room year round. Much of the time I just sit there without much to say. I am amazed at how much staring at him with my morning hair makes him happy.

Can you see the lights behind him and his big smile?

 
We do make a great team. However, like all great teams we have to keep working at the fundamentals to keep being a winning team. This idea of once/week morning breakfast came after a long season of unusual circumstances in our lives. Hubby & I were struggling to stay connected beyond the communication it took to handle the logistics of caring for others (which included emergency foster care and his dad in the hospital for five months in addition to caring for and homeschooling our four children).

This effort to connect in a new way for this new season has reaped much more than the effort it takes to get myself out of bed. We only get about 10-20 minutes before he dashes off to work at 6:30 a.m. but we both look forward to this time.

Something fresh. Something that has a cost. An effort at connecting. These elements contribute to our winning marital team strategy. We both win.

Another bonus has been using up day old French bread; it makes fantastic French Toast. I don't think that I can ever go back.

How about you? 

How could you connect in fresh, meaningful way with someone in your life this week? 

Or perhaps you have a great way to use old bread?

And for those so inclined, the recipe, straight from Betty Crocker, follows:

Custardy Overnight French Toast,
per Betty Crocker's 40th Anniversary Edition

1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/2 cups milk
1 Tablespoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1/4 teaspoon salt
6 eggs
18 slices French bread, each about 1" thick

Beat flour, milk, sugar, vanilla, salt and eggs with hand beater until smooth. Arrange bread slices just to fit in single layer in glass baking dishes. Pour egg mixture over bread slices. Turn to coat both sides. Cover and refrigerate overnight. Heat griddle or skillet over medium heat or to 375 degrees. Cook about 6-8 minutes on each side or until golden brown.

When rearranging a few boxes taught me something about priorities

The dust still settles on the stacks of books on my nightstand and my husband's matching stack of non-book stuff on his nightstand.Yet, aside from those nightstand bundles, the rest of our bedroom has been recently cleared of clutter.

I prepared our home for a stay-cation where my husband & I celebrated 20 years of marriage at home alone without children. I took many boxes out of our room. I wish I could say that I truly decluttered rather than merely moving them to another room.

Nevertheless, taking the clutter out of our bedroom has helped me so much. Not just for a 20th anniversary week but also on a daily basis whenever I walk into our bedroom. It has given me clarity about priorities in the midst of undone projects.

Last summer I began helping our girls tidy their room.  Since they come from parental pack rats, it was a big job. We were unfinished sorting their stuff when we needed the dining room to host a baby shower for a dear friend. So we put the boxes of their stuff into our bedroom instead of theirs -- to help them.

Then, as life flew on by, a medical crisis took our lives by storm. I never got back to the girl's room project. After awhile the extra boxes just became part of the scenery and attracted even more boxes into our bedroom. We have a small house. In an effort to make room for people to come over, I moved more boxes in our bedroom. And here it is -- one year later.

It symbolized our life actually.

As we made room to take care of other people, we shifted the focus of our priorities. Last year my husband and I were called to  emergency foster care, and a father-in-law in the hospital for four months.We gave up a little time for one another during a demanding season of pouring out for others.

It has been a great opportunity to grow-up emotionally and spiritually. Yet, it pushed our focus away from each other. It had to. We are finite beings with limited energy.

It happens gradually this collecting of clutter,  to-do lists, and pressures to be responsible. And yes, there are times to put the boxes in the bedroom and host the shower.

Yet, now is the time to refocus on our marriage. That is what moving a few boxes has taught me.

I  have a visual reminder that I can make our marriage a priority even though pressures remain.

To do-lists, the clutter, the boxes never really go away. It was a season of pouring out for others that demanded more of our attention. Now, the challenge is to go back the focus of one another even though other pressures remain. To realize the pressure of projects and to-do lists is not the same as a father in the hospital struggling to breathe.

We need to keep it all in focus and not let the habits of the demanding season set the standard for the normal way of life.

I do this by taking time for a walk with my spouse even though there are boxes in the dining room that have needed attention for over a year. He is more important.

That is what I am learning by rearranging a few boxes in my house.

What have you been learning lately?
Linking up with Emily at Imperfect Prose.

On holding hands and telling stories

They sat together today. He in the chair. She on the bed. She held his hand. She told him about the grandchildren opening the trunk of costumes out in the barn. And the hours of fun the children had trying on costumes and looking at the mirror. And he smiled and laughed (a silent laugh but a laugh none-the-less). She told him how they caught a mole. And how Sophie held it. And how it had paws like shovels and silky fur. And he smiled and laughed some more.

 She asked him if he'll be able to polka in November when the kids come for Thanksgiving to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. He shrugged his shoulders.

We cheered when he sat in a chair today because it has been days and days and days since he sat in a chair. And the Occupational Therapist had him shrug his shoulders today. Perhaps that's why he was good at that.

He asked her to massage his arms. And she did. So lovingly. Together almost fifty years. Their oneness evidenced by me in the hospital today. Invited and welcomed to be there.

And we are thankful that he breathes today. Better than yesterday.

Thankful for today.
Thankful that he breathes.
Thankful that he communicates.
Thankful she held his hand and they shared life together today.
Thankful for a story about costumes and moles during a long hospital ICU stay.

Maybe more of my time should be spent holding hands and telling stories.
Creating more margin for the real space of real life to take place.

I am thankful for today, even though he is still in ICU, even though it has been longer than 30 days.
Amen.

* * *

What are you thankful for today?

Linking with Ann, Jen and Emily this week.

19 Reasons I Love My Husband on Our 19th Anniversary

Celebrating our 19th anniversary in Pensacola, FL

Five days and nineteen years ago, my husband and I pledged our lives, our love, and honor to one another. In celebration of this momentous occasion, I have penned nineteen reasons that I love him.

 19. His penchant for hats.

Easter Sunday 2012

18. His diligence to look for a job during our Sea of Saturdays (what I termed our season of unemployment because every day felt like a Saturday with Daddy around all of the time). I knew he provided for us faithfully but his perseverance in making cold calls, writing and re-writing his resume,  filling out on-line applications gave me new appreciation for this hat-wearing man.

17. I love his ability to build things. He built a clubhouse for the kids out of a wooden fence that someone had discarded. He bought a box of nails and waa-la we have a clubhouse. He also built a tree house during the Sea of Saturdays.

16. He always wants to sit next to me whether it is at the dinner table, the pew at church, or the couch when we watch a movie. He scoots the kids over to sit next to me. Cherished in the little things I am.

Grizzly Adams with his wife in May 2012 before he shaved.

15. He is a simple man who enjoys simple pleasures. For instance, one of his main hobbies (he says) is growing hair. Look how much fun it can be to grow and shave off. Did you have any idea?

One of the first cuts.

He is just SO Silly!

14. His willing heart (and the kind of jobs he has had)  have allowed him to be available to troubleshoot problems with the kiddos during his work day. This kind of emotional support has been immeasurable to me.

Current Kip.

13. He is generous with his time and money: first with his family (we love vacation daddy!!), his friends, and those in need.

12. He drives 900 miles one way to take all of us to visit my family at least once a year. It's convenient that some of his family now live in the same city but for many years it was a commitment to keep us connected with extended family. It was important to both of us to find someone that fit in well with our family -- we succeeded! We truly enjoy vacationing with family -- what a gift that is.

11. I love how he learned to write cards and notes because it's my love language.

He is not a natural writer. (He is an excellent writer; he just doesn't do it often). When we were dating long-distance back in the day when our long-distance phone bills were costing us an arm and a leg, I would complain of how little he would write, certainly not up to my romantic ideals. He told me then that he had written to me more than anyone else in his life. I had to take it on faith back then but through the years he has written letters and postcards, even on short business trips figuring out how to send letters in advance from our city so that we would have some to open while he was away.

And just the other day -- on a random, ordinary day -- he left a card on the kitchen counter just because! Isn't he wonderful? (Is it getting too sappy yet? Breathe deep we're half-way through the list.)

10. He is an affectionate man, giving hugs and kisses because that's his love language. I have come to love it!

His penchant for hats slipped into his first half-marathon he ran this spring.

9. We love to play games together. The ones we play most often are: Yahtzee, Cribbage and Boggle. (His willingness to play Boggle with me is an act of love.)

8. The secondary love language for both of us is quality time which shows up in game playing, but also in almost daily or should I say --nightly -- talks debriefing about our day. I love it! So often he is ready for the sack but he devotes the time to talk with me. Now that IS true love!

7. I love his musical ability. He sings. He plays guitar. He drums. He breaks out into song often.

6. My planning heart can collide with his sequential "now what's next" ways. The flip side of this is that  he is great at being in this moment, right-now. Good for my soul, that is.

The Us Box in December 2011

5. I love his steady, happy self. He cheers up the household. It has steadied me much to be married to him.

4. I love his love for the Lord. He loves to go to church. He has such a clear idea of principles and just knows the right thing to do.

3. He works the equivalent of two jobs so that I can have the best job ever -- caring for our children and educating them. We have both been committed to that vision from the beginning.

2. He values my opinions, and my decisions. He trusts me. He supports me in so many ways. One of which is symbolized by allowing me to lead a women's Bible study. The kids are older so it doesn't cost quite as much now but he has always allowed me to have a ministry outside of our home.

Can you tell how much we like us by the amount of pix we take together?

1. The best thing that I love about Kip Jaeger is that I have been married to my best friend for 19 years. I have known him for more than half my life. He is the love of my life and my kindred spirit. I am thankful to have had so much time with him. May the Lord give us many more years to share.

How did you spend your Fourth of July? Would you like to count the ways you love your spouse?
Linking with Jen and the SDG sisters.

Feeling number-ish today

I'm feeling a bit number-ish today. Perhaps sometime soon, I'll expound and reflect on the milestones that these numbers of time represent. In the meantime, you can click on the phrases that are different colors and they will lead you to a related post of mine. Years, days, moments -- they go by quickly, don't they?

24 years in Minnesota
1 year in Michigan
20 years in Tennessee
19 years married
13 1/2 years as mom
11 years in this house
8 years of homeschooling completed

25 days with 8 kids
25 days with 5 kids
9 days with 9 kids

Do you suppose that this is what is meant by " Teach us to number our days aright that we may gain a heart of wisdom" means? Psalm 90:12

How about you? How are you feeling today?